If there’s a movie of Manny’s life, it’s sure to be a comedy
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How could any of us possibly craft headlines or spin out one-liners without the help of punchy movie titles or dialogue?
So be prepared to see a spate of riffs along the lines of a popular new chick flick. There was this reference on the website fark.com, playing off The Times’ interview with one Manny Ramirez:
It’s time for Manny Ramirez to face the cold truth: Baseball is just not that into you.
Until Manny signs -- somewhere -- we’ll have to hold off on using this other new movie title: “Taken.”
Trivia time
What is Manny Ramirez’s full name?
Great Scott
Figure skater Scott Hamilton wrote about his ability to laugh at himself and not take himself too seriously, rare gifts in that sport.
“I had the great fortune (or misfortune, if you want to look at it that way) of being parodied by not one, but two SNL [‘Saturday Night Live’] comedians back in the 1990s,” he wrote in his recently released book “The Great Eight.”
The comedians were Dana Carvey and David Spade.
“Spade’s Scott Hamilton was truly over the top,” Hamilton wrote. “He wore this ridiculously ugly blond wig that not only poofed skyward but revealed a very bald forehead. He didn’t have to say anything. The wig alone was a riot.”
Manager(s) beware
Apparently, the so-called vote of confidence for a manager or coach means exactly the same thing in Britain as it does in the United States.
Start packing your bags and hope you can break the lease.
Feb. 2: Bosses of the soccer club Portsmouth back beleaguered Manager Tony Adams, saying they’re behind him.
Feb. 8: Adams reported in the British media to be gone by Monday after a Saturday loss to Liverpool in which the team gave up two goals in the last five minutes.
The envelope, please . . .
Most Overblown Day in Sport? There is plenty of rugged competition in this category -- and, surprisingly, the Super Bowl does not win by unanimous vote.
One writer had a different take.
Miami Herald columnist Greg Cote’s nomination wasn’t any of the All-Star games, either. He focused instead on college football letters of intent: “National Signing Day is the most overblown day in sports, turned into an ‘event’ by the Internet, by the myriad of sad websites that heap a premature national spotlight [and undue] pressure on teenagers.”
Trivia answer
Manuel Aristides Ramirez Onelcida.
And finally
Distance runner Katie McGregor, doing her best Howard Hughes impression to Runner’s World magazine: “I’m a little paranoid about germs. I won’t eat food that’s out in bowls because everyone sticks their hands in there. I’ve also used paper towels to open doors.”
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