As Usual, Writers Are Wronged Again

Norman Sklarewitz of West Hollywood noticed a sign at a commercial building on 3rd Street that said, “Parking for Directors, Producers and Clients Only.”

Asked Sklarewitz: “But isn’t that just about everyone on the Westside?”

WAY OUT: Don’t get the idea that Orange County’s Silverado Canyon--home of Thisa Way, Thata Way and Hidea Way--has a monopoly on unusual street names. Sal Lombardo of West L.A. found Easy Way and Old Fashion Way in Anaheim along with A Better Way in Garden Grove. (No, I don’t know why the Old Fashion isn’t spelled Old Fashioned, which I think would be a better way.)

Dave Beraru of Woodland Hills, meanwhile, discovered Ups and Downs in Oceanside (see photos).

THE MIGHTY DUCKS ARE DEAD DUCKS? At last, a responsible book about Y2K. It’s “In the Year 2000 . . .” by Conan O’Brien and the writers of TV’s “Late Night” show, and here are some of their scholarly predictions:

* Dolphins will be able to speak. But they will be boring and their breath will stink.

* Scientists will discover the secret ingredient in Starbucks Coffee: a chemical that makes people forget they’re paying $4 for a cup of coffee.

* After too many years of nonstop rampages, El Nino decides to check himself into the Betty Ford Clinic.

* There will be no more professional hockey. But the “Disney on Ice” characters will be allowed to body check.

* Twentieth Century Fox will change its name to “Whoa! New Century” Fox.

* Starbucks will make franchise history by opening a Starbucks inside an existing Starbucks.

* A daring and controversial plan to capture Bigfoot will fail when he sends a friend to accept his Oscar for him.

IN CASE YOU’RE WONDERING: Twentieth Century Fox has no plans to change its name next century. At least not until it’s bought out by Starbucks.

ON THE OTHER HAND: 20th Century Insurance Co. does plan to change its name to--you guessed it--21st Century Fox.

I mean, 21st Century Insurance.

miscelLAny:

A colleague reports that while he was in a Fry’s Electronics in Fountain Valley, he saw “a man at a urinal talking on a cell phone. I remarked to the guy, ‘You think this is the right place for that?’ He said, ‘We’re right next to the freeway. The signal’s great.’ ”

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Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (800) LATIMES Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053 and by e-mail at [email protected]