Designer dousing:Musician Doug Hamblin was driving home...

Designer dousing:

Musician Doug Hamblin was driving home after a gym workout when he observed flames and smoke in a brushy area of the median strip of Chandler Boulevard in North Hollywood.

Hamblin stopped, called 911 on his cell phone--and was put on hold. Then he was told he would be transferred over to the Fire Department.

“I got tired of waiting,” he says, “so I grabbed my gym bottle of mineral water and put it out.”

It was Evian. (We had to ask.)

FOOD FOR THOUGHT: Elizabeth Ann Holst suggests that a Wienerschnitzel restaurant in Baldwin Park should modify one sign so that the word “AND” can clearly be seen between the words “DOG” and “BURGER.” Holst adds that she has “fond memories of a beloved dachshund.”

GUYS WITH TIME ON THEIR HANDS: While golfing at the Woodley Lakes course in Encino, Alan Plotkin noticed that outgoing L.A. Police Chief Willie Williams was two groups behind him. And two groups behind the chief, meanwhile, was O.J. Simpson.

TO LIVE AND DRIVE IN L.A.: Oliver Stone’s next movie, you may have heard, is called “U-Turn.” That got us to thinking that you could string together several film titles to describe an Angeleno’s suspenseful morning commute to the office:

* “Car Pool” (1996)

* “Drive, He Said” (1990)

* “Intersection” (1994)

* “U-Turn” (1997)

* “Crash” (1997)

* “Freeway” (1996)

* “Speed” (1995)

* “Breakdown” (1997)

* “Hitch-Hiker” (1953)

* “Taxi Driver” (1976)

* “Nine to Five” (1980)

ANOTHER THING YOU WON’T FIND IN DUBUQUE: The Long Beach Press-Telegram publishes a weekly column called “On Location,” which tracks TV and feature films currently being shot in the beach city.

WONDERS OF TECHNOLOGY: L.A. prides itself on its innovations. But Thomas Theisen of Whittier brings news of a remarkable invention featured on a motel marquee in Big Pine, near Bishop. It says:

WELCOME

FISHERMEN

FAX SHOWERS

Who knows? Perhaps some day we’ll be able to fight fires by fax (instead of by designer water).

miscelLAny

Dennis the Menace Park in Downey, which opened four decades ago when the TV sitcom was a hit, is the only park in L.A. County named for a fictional character. Well, maybe Devils Punchbowl Park near Palmdale.