Ministry Gets Bossy Over Cow-Patty Bingo

TORONTO — Here’s the game: A field is divided into squares, a cow is let loose to roam, and players bet on which square the cow defecates. Hence, cow-patty bingo.

Sounds like fun, eh?

Maybe even a good way to raise money.

But illegal?

A Ministry of Consumer and Commercial Relations manual in Ottawa says lottery licenses will not be granted for the rural charity because “it is not unreasonable to assume that the movements of the cow could be manipulated, thus compromising the integrity of the game.”