The publicists rush into action: Catastrophes, particularly...

The publicists rush into action: Catastrophes, particularly those in show biz-conscious Southern California, seem to produce all manner of experts who are more than willing to appear on television.

One fax sent to The Times trumpeted a psychotherapist who was “available RIGHT NOW to talk on pyromania and why people--primarily men--do this! She’s great!! Call Now! Can be there soon!!”

The headline on the press release seemed to speak of one of the few varieties of disaster that Southern Californians don’t have to worry about. It said:

“These Fires Are Just the Tip of the Iceberg.”

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Unfortunate timing: Amid the chaos, one local radio station didn’t notice that it segued from its fire coverage to an ad that began: “Who doesn’t like a nice crackling fire?” It was a blurb for a fireplace equipment company, whose phone number ended F-I-R-E.

Perfect timing: Veteran anchorman Jerry Dunphy, on the other hand, knew enough to alter his longtime trademark opening on the Channel 9 news Wednesday night. He intoned: “From the desert to the sea to all of Southern California--it’s not a good evening.”

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Coming soon--the Smog Frog: In the wake of the fires, the Audubon Society has added an appropriate character--the phoenix--to today’s “All Species Day” celebration with local schoolchildren. The phoenix, of course, is the mythical bird that was consumed by fire and then arose from the ashes.

“A lot of the kids were upset by the fires,” pointed out spokeswoman Margaret Scully. “This will help reassure them.”

The event, which begins at 1:15 at the L.A. Zoo’s Wildlife Theater, will include a parade of children in self-designed animal costumes, some of which warn of an ominous future.

“Some of the kids are dressing as future species that have been mutated by pollution,” Scully said.

“I think we’ll have some Smog Frogs and Exhaust Egrets, that sort of thing.”

Maybe someone will come as the meteorite that wiped out the dinosaurs. Or was it that tip of an iceberg?

The historical angle: In “Controlling Nature,” author John McPhee has a chapter, “Los Angeles Against the Mountains,” in which he writes of the combustibility of the local canyon areas.

“It is not a great rarity,” McPhee wrote, “to pick up the Los Angeles Times and see a headline like this one, from Sept. 27, 1970: ’14 Major Fires Rage Out of Control.’ ”

Those who picked up Thursday’s Times saw this headline: “13 Fires Ring Southland.”

miscelLAny:

Francis Tomlinson of Oceanside sent along drawings of Dragonfly, his invention of a “precision firefighting helicopter.” Its accessories include “a quick-connect and disconnect firefighting fluid tank,” a pump mounted near the engine, a “control module” and “nozzle boom.” The boom can break windows to fight fires in buildings. Tomlinson hasn’t been able to get the machine off the ground, financially speaking.